I Don't Know but They Found Me

I Don't Know but They Found Me

Finck, Eliza

Artist’s Statement: These new paintings are about a break in reality. This is an exploration of my own experience and struggles with bipolar disorder, focusing dissociation and psychosis during extreme phases in mood. Each painting starts with a writing, hidden directly under the paint. This work is about a place on the edge of my consciousness where real isn’t quite real and fiction isn’t quite fiction. I visit there from time to time, but it’s not somewhere I choose to go--- a completely believable dream, one that I reference later as fact. I see things out of the corners of my eyes, until they are the center of my vision. Did I take my medicine today? There is someone walking parallel to me, but everytime I turn to look at them they’re gone. The sky lights up at night like a spotlight. The birds are targeting me, diving at me. Did you hear those people talking, their whispers? The lines between real and fake get blurry. This is a place where I can almost see the air, and the pharmacist asks me if I’m doing okay when I pick up my prescription. I count my edges over and over. When did I get so sharp? These paintings focus on a constant gamble on reality.

2021

Rights held by author.

21VADS-009